Voicemails From Mom

memories2

I think I have a little bit of a hoarding problem.  My coworkers and I  joke that as teachers, we feel the need to save everything, “just in case.”  Every once in awhile, I get inspired to purge and throw things away but I still find myself with way too much paper work and “stuff.”  This even carries over to technology.  I am always getting notifications that my email and voicemail boxes are full and I have to go through and pick and choose what needs to be deleted.  Today, I noticed that I had A LOT of voicemails.  Old ones, new ones, important ones, insignificant ones, too many to count.  Among them, I found several from my mom!  I hadn’t remembered that they were there.  I listened to them today.  None of them were more than fifteen seconds, and they all began the same way all of her messages did, “Hello, its only me…”  None of them were about anything too important either.  Just her checking in, or saying hello.

She and I spoke every single day.  Usually more than once.  Our conversations were rarely of importance, just, “how was your day,” or “what are you making for dinner?”  I’d call for a recipe or she’d call to check in on the kids.  It didn’t matter what we were talking about.  I guess it was just hearing each others voice that brought both of us comfort.  As I have written so many times before, I wish so much that  if only I could still just pick up the phone to say hi.  I wonder what I’d say to her if I had that chance?!?

As I listened to the messages today, I realized that there is a void – a sound missing in my life.  Her voice.  I have to find a way to save those messages.  Knowing that they are there, and that I can listen to her anytime I need to hear her voice is comforting to me.  It is a part of her that can’t leave me now because, now, I have her voice!!

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6 thoughts on “Voicemails From Mom

  1. Leslie pogany October 27, 2013 at 7:08 am Reply

    Listen treasure and keep them forever…if you figure out how to save them let me know…I miss your Mom what a woman. She was proud of her children & Grandchildren you are blessed.❤️❤️❤️

  2. clairesinclair October 27, 2013 at 7:18 am Reply

    Leslie, thank you so much! I am going to find a more “techy” person than myself. I am sure there is a way to do it! I will let you know!

  3. lovetheoneinfront October 28, 2013 at 9:56 am Reply

    I just want to say how encouraged I am by your softness and your kind heart! I feel for your pain as I’ve had loss in my family as well and I just want to encourage you to use this as a way to further push for more love and kindness! I love the quote you use.. that even the smallest acts of kindness matter. You’re doing great!

  4. Kathy's Chronicles November 1, 2013 at 4:11 pm Reply

    I understand your thoughts…I lost my brother in June. The week before he died, he called and left a message on my voicemail. It was just a run of the mill message, and clearing out the inbox, I deleted it. Now I wish over and over that I still had it. I realize you can’t save everything for “just in case” but I do miss the ability to just listen to his voice and imagine that he is still here.

    • clairesinclair November 1, 2013 at 4:53 pm Reply

      Thanks for sharing. I am sure there will be memories that you will find in all sorts of places.

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